Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Wacky Hair Wednesday

Today was Wacky Hair Wednesday at Colton's school, so this morning I put about 1/2 cup of gel in his hair and made a mohawk.  Neglected to get a picture, but that's not the point of this post anyway.  While Colton and I were in the bathroom using the blow dryer to solidify our masterpiece, I heard Mack crying in the other room.  I yelled out to Casey to ask him what he did to her (and maybe that sounds presumptious, but let's face it:  that is usually why Mack is crying).  He came guiltily sprinting down the hallway, like that would somehow create an alibi after the fact.  ("It couldn't have been me, I was right here the whole time.")  Mackenzie then rounded the corner holding the scissors I use for crocheting.  Casey said, "Uh-oh, Mom, Baby has scissors!!"  Now, I baby-proof the shit out of this house, so I know I didn't leave them where she could reach them, but whatever, blah blah blaaaahh I'm in a hurry go find your shoes I'm not dealing with this right now go go go hurry up.
It was when I was changing Mackenzie's diaper that I noticed the scratch on her face.  I asked Casey if she had been crying because he scratched her, and his response was to leap behind a chair to hide from me (translation:  YES).  Then I started brushing her hair to put it in a ponytail, which was when I noticed that her hair seemed to be falling out in clumps.  It was all over my pants, the carpet and the hairbrush.  After about 2.6 seconds of panic, I finally put the damned puzzle pieces together:

Casey the Bean, in the living room, with the crochet scissors. 
(and this is just the chunk that I found on top the storage unit-- which, incidentally, is where I keep my scissors.)
"Uh-oh, Mom, Baby has scissors!"??  That boy.

On a side note.... perhaps this beastliness comes from his mother.  I was driving home from the bank earlier today when a school bus pulled out right in front of me.  I'm a pretty laid back driver in my old age (cruise control at 60, hang out in the right lane, listen to music, avoid the aggressors).  But really... that bus pulled out right in front of me so I had to hit the brakes fast.  I said, "Are you freaking kidding me??"  Then Casey piped up from the backseat:  "Are you freaking kidding us, Bus??"  Eh.  At least I didn't say the other F word.

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Kingdom of... Heaven?

Saturday.  Casey and Mackenzie's Nap Time.  Let's Do This Shit.

Colton focused as I've never seen him focus to complete this project.  I only wish homework was that easy for him.


Admiring the finished product.  But.... but wait....



Behold!  On the horizon, a new enemy lurks!

The eager eyes, the wanton curiousity!

HE CAME TO DESTROY.


"Halt!  Who goes there?  Friend or foe??"  (Seriously, Colton actually said that exact line.  Mackenzie's $1.29 Goodwill Royal Carriage is always spewing nonsense like that.)



"Push all you want, peasant!  I will casually continue to enjoy this feast of grilled cheese while I fight you off with my one apathetic arm."





Aaah, the temporary (and, dare I say, smug?) satisfaction of being bigger and stronger, and yet having no clue what awaits him when that gap narrows in a few years...

 But for now... the Kingdom is saved! Victory!

And yes, more grilled cheese.


I mean, it kinda serves Casey right.  Yesterday, I was getting after him for throwing a fit about one thing or another, and he said, "Oh!  I'm sorry, Mama.  But that's a beautiful necklace you're wearing."  Whaaa?... Eh.  Mmmph.   *throwing hands in the air, eyes rolling, giving up, going to sleep*




Meanwhile, back at Ye Olde Genetic Modification Plant.......







P.S.  Saturday night dinner sans Shawn:  Grilled cheese on the couch, Spiderman in the DVD player: